I'm avoiding boring stuff

I'd rather be making mischief

Hello there,

Happy Monday! The truth is I’m writing to you because I have a really complicated and boring task which I need to start today, and I thought it would be more fun to write you a wee letter.

I’m avoiding doing the thing, even though I know it will lead to good things including possibly joy, fulfillment or maybe even relief!

Do you have one of these tasks to do today too? Is that why you opened this — to give yourself a little break? Hi!

My house and my mind feel full. Some days I feel like I have to wade through so much stuff — mentally, physically, emotionally — to get to the part where I’m actually giving my attention to what matters.

There is the river of kid’s books and toys and clothes that I have to ford to get to my desk. There are the drifts of faff on my desk: the broken music mixer, the forms for my kid’s school that I still haven’t filled out, the toilet paper roll that’s been turned into a person with freckles, my nana’s pearl necklace that somehow escaped the box, the tiny plastic carrot, the lighter that tempts me to set the school forms on fire.

Then there are the dinging notifications, those emails that have been lingering for far too long, the invoices I need look at (go ahead, judge me. I do not have my s*** together), and the voice in my head that is saying, You’re not even a real adult, you know nothing at all.

Etc.

Sometimes it helps me to actually clean up: to put things away where they belong, deal with the things that need dealing with, wipe down surfaces with a cloth. Sometimes it helps me to just get things out of my line of sight: take everything off my desk and put it on the floor so I can at least pretend to have space.

But at this point in my life, most of the time, if I really want to get something done, I just have to get on with it. Is your life like this too?

Some tasks are easier to get on with because somebody else is asking me to do them, and there will be bad consequences if they are not done.

But there are some things: things that are really really important to me on the level of soul, that no one else in the world is holding me accountable for. These are creative and highly significant acts which exist outside of my roles as a parent and a cog in the capitalist machine.

Do you know what I am talking about?

Are you called to do such things?

Maybe it’s a book you want to write, a performance you want to create, a series of paintings or photos you want to put together (or maybe something more niche and weird).

Some people call these acts making art, but I feel like these words fall flat. Today, I want to call these acts making mischief.

Whether your life is dreadfully full or dreadfully empty, it can be hard to stay connected to this ‘mischief making’ part of yourself on your own.

I tell myself that it is not important. I tell myself I am not allowed. I tell myself that I need to get my life together first. I let all the other things get in the way.

And yet when I do connect to this part of myself regularly, it feels as if there is a fire alight inside me. It energises me to get through all the other hard adulting.

I’m in the process of building something for those of us who want to stay connected to this ‘mischief making’ part of ourselves. It actually has something to do with the complicated and boring task I really need to make a start on today…

OK, how about we make a deal? I’ll email you as soon as I’ve finished my task. I plan to have it finished in the next couple of days. And then maybe if you’re up for it, we can make some mischief together??

With love,

Rata

Here is a photo of me being a seal. 📸 by Izzie Birnie.

P.S. Yes I’m still off social media and into trees. I loved reading your tree stories last month. Sorry if I haven’t responded to you yet.